Friday, September 18, 2009

Under-the-covers Economist

Interesting developments are always taking place in the field of economics. After Bhutan, Costa Rica, and a recent French report, it's becoming inevitable:

Man does not live by GDP alone. A new report urges statisticians to capture what people do live by. [..]

In recent years economists have therefore been looking at other measures of well-being — even "happiness", a notion that it once seemed absurd to quantify.
We are scratching our heads trying to determine what would the stimulus package be in case the economy goes into a recession once the new GDH economic indicator is in effect. We speculate it would have something to do with either latex products, Viagra, or both. Which leads to our next dilemma.

Now, we here at financial tactics do not have the means to keep an undercover economist on staff. Not even a fictitious economist, of any sort. (Nor a more prolific writer, for that matter. Hence our low post count.) We therefore address our quandary to the real expert in the field. Virtually, of course.

Dear Economist,

We have a question, which has puzzled us for a while now, for the Undercover Economist in your employ.

Considering that sperm cell counts have fallen by 50 per cent worldwide since 1940, or so according to a Danish study, apparently due to an increase in pollutants such as petroleum by-products and polychlorinated biphenyls (though we strongly suspect this has more to do with the stressful overtime activity that the employed male of the species is forced to undertake), how would you advise (purely from an economic point of view) to handle a prophylactic full of LNG (Liquefied Nomadic Gametes): Carefully drop it into the recycle bin? Relegate it to the compost bin (towards the generation of somewhat fertile soil)?! Dispose of it in the rubbish bin (though what we have over here are mere garbage cans)?

financial tactics, Toronto

2 comments:

  1. I understand the economic model (I think), but I shudder at the thought of opening the Hallmark cards - you know, those with Happiness is...

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  2. How appropriate here — GDH: Gross (!) Domestic Happiness...

    ReplyDelete